Taking on a new venture

I never thought I would ever commit to taking kids into the home, other than my own, on a full time basis. Being a stay-at-home mom is hard enough, but adding other kids into the picture makes it even harder to get stuff done or get out and socialize. However, my neighbors are losing their dayhome (as the dayhome is moving)...and they thought it might just work out for me to take over the care of their 3 yr. old daughter. I have said I will do a trial of 2 weeks to see how my kids react to her and vice versa, and just how easy or not it is to go out with 3 of them. I have also only committed to 6 months maximum and the hours will be 9-3:30pm.
These are my reasons for doing it...it will help them out...obviously, it's convenient, they know us, they don't have to search out a new dayhome. It is really the ideal situation for this little girl who is usually one of 6 kids in a dayhome where they can't get out much as there are just too many kids to take places. I think it will make me a more organized mommy. Seeing that they will be at my door at 9am, it will make sure I am up, showered and all of us dressed by that time. I will have to be more scheduled and hope to make more of a planned week ie. Mondays-library, Tuesdays-gym, Wednesdays-craft, Thursday-baking etc. The afternoons will all be lazy ones as Riley is at school, Liam naps and the girl will have a quiet time. I don't know what the pay will be, but that will help out too. I really need some furniture!! Being that it's only one child, I will still be able to go out to the pool, the zoo etc. without too much hassle. We have a mini van after-all ;)
I get to hang out with a girl...just in case I never have one of my own. The father is flexible as he has his own business, so if I need to get away, he'd be accomodating for sure.
Anyway...this all doesn't start til November. I would appreciate any words of advice for those that have done this. Knowing it's not an all-day and permanent position doesn't make me feel like I'm depriving my children of their time with me. They probably will enjoy the company.

Never tried this before...

Photo Sharing - Upload Video - Video Sharing - Share Photos

Here's the boys...live. They are just starting their band...in our living room. I think Riley will be lead singer. Liam seems to enjoy doing the back-up and making weird faces.

Big boy undies

Yup...this is officially the cold turkey try at potty training Liam. Now that we are back in routine, I've committed from today (Thurs) til Sunday to keep him in his Bob the Builder big boy undies...regardless of the endless messes and failed attempts to reach the potty. For those who haven't done the potty training routine...this is the BEST way. If he seems to have no concept by Sunday night...I'll put back on the diapers and give it a go next month. So wish us all luck. He looks so darn cute in his undies with his thick little Davidson thighs sticking out. I need to take a picture of that.
And last night, Riley passed his 3 last sections of his gate test and earned his Sparks vest...he is so proud. He can sing our national anthem (check out My Videos). I'll take a pic of that too...once we finally get dressed!
Greg is home sick today...nearly coughed up a lung this morning. We're not getting much sleep around here. Otherwise all is good...no more mommy meltdowns!

It's Fall

Finally the near-snowing days have left for awhile again, and since Saturday it has been gorgeous and sunny.

I went on this

(pic taken by altamon on flickr)
Ya...it's really fun! It's been a long time since I've been on any rides. It has a huge drop and then does 2 loops (upsidedown). It's here at Calaway park in Calgary and it's super fun. We spent almost 5 hours there today and it actually got warm and sunny.
Liam went on his first roller coaster ride...Andrew took this priceless picture. He screamed the whole time!!

Mommy meltdown

It hasn't been the best week. In fact it has been a really exhausting year, come to think of it. For me. The mommy. I try to keep things light, share in all the triumphs and great things that have gone on in life. I like the fact that I'm a pretty optomistic person and relatively stable. But there are times when things build up and come to a head...such as this morning. For most moms...the day your child comes out of your womb and into your arms, the world stops as you know it and everything begins to revolve around your baby and their needs. When you sleep, eat, enjoy times out, what you spend money on, the activities you do etc. etc. all depend on what the child can handle or would enjoy doing. It is a shock to the system at first (as a new mom), but it is also new and exciting. Then the honeymoon period ends...you've added another child or two, and five years later you are still doing EVERYTHING you possibly can to ensure that your children are happy, loved, healthy and learning. It was one of those days today when I'm trying to avoid the fighting of my two...thinking going to the pool would be a great thing to do with them. As I'm rushing around getting towels and bathing suits in the bag, Riley decides to sit at the bottom of the stairs and wail like a maniac because he can't get his pj shirt off. "Just wait, honey! I'm packing our bags!" "NO! I DON'T WANT TO WAIT! COME TAKE MY SHIRT OFF!" Scream some more. Finally I convince him to come where I am instead of screaming his head off. I take his shirt off and then tell him he needs to spend some time in his room and think of what he could have done that would have been a better way to ask. More screaming and wailing and gnashing of teeth. When I went in again to see him, I lost it. I cried. I guess it was the straw that broke the camels back. I have never cried in front of him. What was going through my head was...HOW UNGRATEFUL CAN YOU BE? I do everything in my life for you and your happiness...and yet you will scream at me to do more. I just can't do it. I will never be enough to make you happy. I have sacrificed everything and still you are predominantly mad and ungrateful. Somehow I tried to explain in his words, that mommy is trying to do something good for him, yet he is treating mommy badly...blah blah. Everything is a lecture, a lesson. Nag nag. On and on. I'm very tired. And he's only 4. What am I going to do when he is 15 and the issues are much huger. I don't know. I was overwhelmed by it all this morning and realized how unequipped I am for this assignment. My childhood friend Heidi had the heart to send me an online devotional she saw that might speak to me today about mommy guilt. Thanks! It meant a lot to see that in my inbox when I'm feeling so low. I know I need to give more to God and rely less on me...because I am so insufficient and often feel so alone with a huge burden.
Thank you for letting me use this blog as therapy. Somehow it helps to write it down and get it all out.

Finally

Blogger in Beta has finally sorted itself out and I can finally comment again. In case you were wondering why I've seemed absent. It was cuz I couldn't comment at all.
And hey, Heidi?? Where is your blog?! ;)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MICHELLE!!!

Today is my old friend Michelles, 30th birthday!! Not that she's old, cuz as we all know, 30 is the new 20. No, it's just that she's been a friend since we were 15. You might remember the poem I had written for her about when we'd grow old together.
Anyway...have a super special day!! I wish I could be there to bring balloons to your door. Too bad she lives a million miles north. She's coming to see me in a month, and I just can't wait. I don't have a scanner, but today I'm going to take some pictures of some old photos to post on here of her and I.
Love you Chelle-Belle!

Last night Greg brought a book home he had found for the kids at the library...it's called..."The Stinky Cheese Man and other Fairly Stupid Tales". (substitute "silly")
by Jon Scieszka and Lane Smith
Here's a sample...
"Once upon a time there was a mother duck and a father duck who had seven baby ducklings. The seventh was a really ugly duckling. Everyone used to say, What a nice looking bunch of ducklings-all except that one. Boy, he's really ugly. The really ugly duckling heard these people, but he didn't care. He knew that one day he would probably grow up to be a swan and be bigger and look better than anything in the pond. Well, as it turned out, he was just a really ugly duckling. And he grew up to be just a really ugly duck. The End."
Ok, one more...
"Once upon a time there was a Prince. And this Prince's dad and mom (the King and Queen) somehow got it into their royal heads that no princess would be good enough for their boy unless she could feel a pea through one hundred mattresses. So it should come as no surprise that the Prince had a very hard time finding a princess. Every time he met a nice girl, his mom and dad would pile one hundred mattresses on top of a pea and then invite her to sleep over. When the princess came down for breakfast, the Queen would ask, How did you sleep, dear? The princess would politely say, Fine, thank you. And the king would show her the door. Now this went on for three years. And of course nobody ever felt the pea under one hundred mattresses. Then one day the Prince met the girl of his dreams. He decided he better do something about it. That night, before the princess went to bed, the Prince slipped his bowling ball under the one hundred mattresses. When the princess came down for breakfast the next morning, the Queen asked, How did you sleep, dear? This might sound odd, said the princess. But I think you need another mattress. I felt like I was sleeping on a lump as big as a bowling ball. The king and queen were satisfied. The Prince and Princess were married. And everyone lived happily, though maybe not completely honestly, ever after. The End."
:)

Memory

Turns out that Riley has the same brain as his daddy. That's a good thing, especially when it comes to memorizing things. I just got Riley into a church Awana club every Wednesday evening. It's something I grew up with, and am happy to get him involved in now too. The main focus of the club is for children to hide God's word in their heart. He learned John 3:16 this week, as well as the Awana pledge. We're currently working on the Oh Canada song, and the Sparks song, and then he'll earn his vest which he can't wait for!! Check him out on dropshots (My videos).
I've been doing the same trick I used to do for myself when I was trying to study for school exams...I got out a blank tape and have been saying the verses over and over, and/or singing the songs for him to listen to before bed. They've also started memorizing scripture in Sunday school, so Riley has been quoting verses left and right. It's been nice to hear his little 4yr old voice around the house saying things other than "I WANT A SNACK".

Birthday parties

We went to a joint party last night for our two friends who have sons that turned 2 this past week. Lots of fun. It is great when the kids are old enough to enjoy the cake and singing and can open their own presents. Liam as usual, enjoyed the party as much as the birthday kids. In this picture, he is actually wearing one of the presents for Eli...a new orange vest. Liam grabbed it and said !!"NOW ELI HAS A LIFE JACKET SO HE CAN GO ON GRAMPA ZINK'S BOAT!"
(Thanks for the photo, Andrew!)

Ok, maybe not

So I was inspired by blog friend Angella and our friends here in Calgary who have just started to let their boys share a room. Buddies, roommates, sleepovers...the whole cute picture. I told the boys tonight that they were having a temporary sleepover. We moved Liam's little car bed over to Rileys room. We gave strict instructions for them to stay in their beds, listen to the story tape, be quiet, etc. etc. Well...Liam is just too much of a party animal. The second he thought we were out of listening range, he'd whisper over to Riley "Hey Rilo, let me pray with you", and he'd jump into Rileys bed and grab his hand. Whispers turned to talking, then yelling. There was a lot of jumping, banging. Riley came out several times, "LIAM WON'T STOP TALKING!", "I TOLD LIAM TO BE QUIET, BUT HE WON'T LISTEN." "NOW HE'S IN MY BED!". Greg went up a few times to quiet them down. One time Greg stopped on the top stair and then peeked around. "You go downstairs, daddy" says Liam. He was ready to party all night. We could only handle poor tired Rileys whining for so long. Back went the car bed into the other room. The boys hugged and parted and then fell asleep in 2 short minutes.
I guess maybe we'll try it again in 6 months!!

Time to report

Hi...I finished that book already. Ya, I rock. Actually...I'm usually fast with books once I finally start them. In fact I get a little crazy with them, not wanting to put them down at all...forgetting things like...lunch, or opps, time for school. Ya. Doesn't work well when you're a mom. That's why I haven't read much in the past few years...that and that I don't like to be interrupted at the good parts which happens all the time with my boys! Oh well...I'll have plenty days ahead of me for silent reading.
Anyway...so ya, it was called Tara Road by Maeve Binchy. It was pretty good. I won't say it was excellent, but it was worth reading and kept me interested the whole way through. I think it was on Oprahs Book Club. About two women who have difficult things happen in their lives, one in America and one in Ireland...they end up switching homes for 2 months and it helps them deal with their hurts. Good girl story. I liked it.
Busy day today with swimming lessons starting up too...Riley is getting to be quite the little fish, unlike 2 short years ago when he was gripping my neck and refusing to part.

Time to rise and shine

Last night was like spending time with a lazy drunken teenager who had just found out his parents were coming home from their vacation and the house was in a mess and he needed to clean it up and get out of there as soon as possible but he couldn't remember where the door was.
Your mind can make up strange stories when you are desperately trying to sleep but this mad fly is buzzing around you making a terrible buzz and madly bumping into the window like 50,000 times.
Grrrr.
The neighbors might have laughed if they had walked by at 12:39am to witness me in my nasty red academy shorts and old white t-shirt...flinging around an old orange fly swatter. Greg was laughing. I never did catch the stupid thing. I had that same feeling as I did when my mom used to come in my room at 8am on a Saturday singing, "Good morning, good morning, good morning, it's time to rise and shine. Good morning, good morning, good morning, I hope you're feeling fine..." Grrrr again.
Ya, not so great a night.
Once I woke up over a bowl of peach yogurt mixed with rice krispies, all was ok.

Pumba

Ya, that's what we nicknamed my friend while we were at Bible School. I met her when we were both 19 and she was on my dorm hall. She was super hilarious...had her whole life sorted out...was going to marry her boyfriend and raise 8 kids in the jungles of Venezuela. Fast forward 10 years, and she is now married to a pastor, has 3 kids and lives in Indiana. She's always so great about calling us when she's near Calgary, visiting her family. Every time I see her, one of us has had another baby. So she came today with her 3 equally hilarious kids in tow. Huge smiles and funny giggles. Fun. I have fond memories of going to her parents house when we'd get a school break. We'd get such a bang out of her family (she has two younger brothers), who at the table would talk about the funniest things and everything was all so crazy funny. You'd smile so much that your face would hurt after awhile. They lived in a little old farm house and we'd cram into the living room and spare room and giggle til we fell asleep. It's been a LONG time since I've done that!! So good to get in touch with friends I had from when I was in that stage of life so I can feel young again and remember all those crazy days. It's funny though, that when I was in that stage, I couldn't wait to grow up, get married and have kids. And now here I am, in a super hard part of the journey where going out or having people over is a real challenge. Maybe I'll look back one day and say the same thing...oh to have a 2 and 4 year old again!!
Anyway, thanks Pumba, if you find this blog, for coming over and making me laugh again.

Changes

I knew that life would change quickly once Riley started school. It is kind of weird that every day after lunch I will be doing drop off and every day at 3:30 will be pickup time....and the drop off/pick up will continue for many years to come. Definitely a new stage. Still a little weird to not walk him into his classroom and just to have him wave goodbye and follow his teacher to his room. And of course, his teacher knows "everything". Today he was quite psyched to tell me all about the fire drill they had. Funny to hear him quote books I have never read, or sing songs I have never taught him. I am beyond thrilled to share this responsibility with another trained adult!! Oh, to be completely responsible to mold his little brain would kill me. I don't know how those homeschooling moms can do it and still manage to sleep!

I also knew life had changed as I opened his backpac to find our first ever fundraising package....I haven't even opened it yet to find out what kind of coupons they are for. Too bad they aren't chocolates. Mmmm.
And I have TIME! to sit and think for awhile, or clean my ghastly disorganized house without any interuption. (Liam has been sleeping the entire time that Riley is gone.) I even started two new books...Tara Road, by Maeve Binchy, and another one of Raising Happy Kids. I'll give you a report on those later.
I also took down the crib today. Both my boys loved their cribs and would remain in their crib til their little toes were hanging out the end if I would let them. But I knew he could handle it, so down went the crib to our basement collection of baby things. We've had a crib set up for almost 5 years straight, so it's kinda weird.
September is so full of new stuff. A little overwhelming, but exciting none the less. I signed myself up last night for a huge role in Childrens ministry, of teaching the half hour lesson every other Sunday to the large group. I did not sleep well and did not have any peace about it all day today. I finally got a hold of the leader tonight and managed to back out of it so I could use my gifts in a much different area...more behind the scenes. I feel much more at peace. I also need to get a little more on top of my own spiritual needs before I try to make such a bold move in leadership.
S

No comment

Sorry guys...I have been trying to comment on various posts, but I screwed something up when I tried to update my blog and now it won't let me comment. I am reading!! I'll keep trying to figure it out.

Kindergarden

And he's off! Somedays it felt like this day would never come, and now here it is. He had to get his shots today too. I was so angry with him yesterday for being overtired and cranky yet refusing to rest and waking up his brother. Then today as he got pricked and was trying to be brave, I almost cried with him. And how can you not be proud when you've managed to keep them alive and he's ready to go to kindergarden!! It'll be a good year.

Thanks "aunt Elizabeth"

My aunt took many pictures while we were with her at the coast...here's some more. A good summary of what summer means to a toddler. Thanks so much...and it was great to see you and have you meet Liam!
HUGS TO YOU!

Back to reality

Well...we made it back safely last night. The boys did their usual 20 min. cat nap in the van, instead of Liam's usual 2-3 hour afternoon sleep. They just will not sleep in upright seats.
We had spent the rest of the week visiting around with relatives and going to the beach. We filled up our "family" tank as best as we could before we returned home to Calgary. We are looking forward to catching up with friends and starting all the fall events. Like KINDERGARDEN tomorrow! Yikes! Riley had a particularily crappy day today (mostly due to being overtired but refusing to sleep) so I am hoping that kindergarden and scheduling will somehow whip him into shape or else I am going to need to take some serious parenting courses or take on more serious discipline actions. Super nanny! where are you?!? Why don't kids understand that we want them to have fun, and we want what's best for them??
In other news, you should see my sunflowers! They are massive! I'm sure they are over 10 ft. tall. The fruit and veggies all did well too, and the grass was long but healthy. I was hoping they'd be fine, as on our holidays there was only one day of rain where we were. We spent the day doing the yardwork, laundry, dishes, unpacking and grocery shopping...so glad that we had left that extra day to get it all done. It was hot and gorgeous out, so the boys enjoyed time in the back yard.

Ya, hmmm....on to another year. My family and Greg's is going through huge changes right now...mostly in careers, but also with a mix of new babies and a couple failed relationships. Everyone just feels so unsettled. The stress of that all is slightly forgotten as we sit in our cozy little house in the middle of a large city.