You've heard me compare myself to the "Old Woman who lived in a Shoe"? (She had so many children, she didn't know what to do?) Ya, that was referring to those moments where I feel SO outnumbered. I really honestly want to do the right thing with my kids, and meet their individual needs, but sometimes being pulled in three directions makes it seem impossible. I want to help them problem solve and not lash out in anger. I want them to feel loved, happy and important. I want them to feel appreciated and heard. I want to help teach them things and give them good eye contact and learn social skills. But alas, I often feel like I'm only able to give each of them about 30% of me while the rest is shared with their siblings and other jobs I have going on at the same time.
I've been talking to a lady who was sharing some info with me that I thought would be important to share to you other mothers out there.
"Ten Caring Ways to Connect with Children Each Day"
1. Compassion: Honor all of your feelings, and listen with empathy to each other.
2. Clear communication: Express your emotions simply, and speak from the heart together.
3. Creativity: Try new things, be playful, and invite the unexpected.
4. Consistency: Do what you say, and say what you mean each day.
5. Challenge: Approach problems with positive expectancy, and learn from the challenges.
6. Cheerfulness: Embrace the day with lightheartedness, and learn to enjoy life.
7. Confidence: Trust and believe in your own talents and in the abilities of others.
8. Calmness: Breathe and live from a calm center within yourself each day.
9. Clear agreements: Create clear agreements and rules that everyone understands and feels good about.
10. Commitment: Be committed to being true to yourself and honest with others each day.
That's a good challenge, isn't it.
Then eventually, over time...we might be able to take after the book "Positively Mother Goose" and change our rhyme to...
"The Bold Woman Who lived in a Shoe"
There was a bold woman who lived in a shoe. She had many children and knew what to do. "You all are so lovable, with special gifts", she said. She hugged them all fondly and tucked them in bed.
2 comments:
Sarah I know what you're saying. Good advise.
Having the boys at 9, 6, and 3 years old - I find they are all in very different stages of life. Plus I know that I raise my voice too often b/c they don't even listen to that anymore! I've been doing a lot of deep breathing lately (I'm getting light headed!) and have started whispering instead b/c then they actually pay attention to what I'm saying!
I think you're doing great - we shall make it past this phase too.
This is such a great list. Thank you for sharing it!
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